The teenage years, the nightmare. The you tube link You tube link https://youtu.be/yy5NAF-FlwY
It started with abandonment. The older brothers went off. Military, employment, out of state CA.
I left off going to the hospital for surgeries by then. I had enough.
New man, new sibling, and then new house.
But the older ones were gone or on the way out.
They found employment. They found careers, off they went.
North Carolina and VA and CA.
95, the family moved towards that end.
Chip on my shoulder, moved from middle school to high school
I had enough with the yellow bus.
Francis Lewis had the computers and Business specialty.
I should have chose the high school up the block. Everyone else did, they walked to school.
For me, the yellow bus was the legacy in my teenage years I wanted to shed. I did so to my own detriment.
B13, B22, J-train, Q24/34, Q65, E-train, and the B17, the myriad of buses and trains, J to the E-train.
Imagine this, a cripple teen, getting up and out by 6am, to travel one hour and half to get to school, one way, and do it again in the afternoon. I wanted to shed the yellow bus, prove my independence, it was crazy.
I should have listened to mom, but I had enough. 25 lbs of books on my back.
By the time I got home it was 6pm, and I needed to do my homework.
But, I was in so much pain, I barely did the math and other assignments. The pain caused the spasms.
Grinding pain in my hip socket that did not have any cartilage. Bone on bone on my left hip.
Soiled I was often coming home. Yep, poop and pee in the pants. But, It was pride, I made it home and from school.
The abandonment. They left and forgot the last two. The last two siblings. Off to races, the pit bull was not for them.
I looked like a hot mess. But, I did not see the wrong. My pride said I will not be defined by my disability.
Long hair, but we went to our neighborhood barber. He cut our hair and knew all of our stories for sure.
In the teenage years, in high school, there was no hanging out for me. School was full-time. I graduated but did not even go to the graduation. Did not go to the prom. I proved the point to my detriment. No resources, no brothers to guide me. Everyone left. They took advantage of all that and knew what it meant. I did have the yearbook thingy. The meaning was not passed down to me. And, my mom did not know of any of those activities, hell, she did not have that when she grew up.
One friend is still here, that is Kim. One cousin still is here, that is Manny. And, one tie to the old family, that is Junior.
There was no curfew. I got home, ate, was in pain, did homework, went to sleep, and began again the next day.
Yes, I did cut class in school. We hid in the bathroom for those bad periods. I missed the fact the other kids whom cut would just walk out from school, of-course I could not do that, I would be spotted instantly.
It was all about mainstreaming then and accommodations. I almost got suspended for peeing on the stairs. Think, I barely could keep my pee, and then they wanted us to walk four flights of steps to the open bathroom on the first floor, nope, you better give me a key to the teacher bathrooms, and they did. Most teachers were women, so the men’s teachers bathroom remained unchecked all the time.
No dating, no nothing in High school and teenage years. School was the pain and gain.
Nothing was there for me. The brothers abandoned us two.
Nobody taught me to drive, no car. I learned all that on my own in the college years, God blessed then.
College is when I got my first car. It was through student loans. It was the Olds Cutlass station wagon.
The car with the massive oil leak.
I did not participate in anything high school related. All my soul and blood was dedicated just getting to school. I remember some of the others talking about the prom and those things. I heard about the festivities and few times I rode the yellow bus. I heard about graduation.
I am not sure, it was instilled in us to finish high school. I liked the wood shop and computer classes. Loved delivering newspapers and placing coupons on the cars before my siblings left. That is how I got a Commodre Vic 20 and all the hamsters, before they left.
My grades reflected the lack of support. Nobody tutored or helped me. They had the tutoring and helped each other. By the time I made it to high school they were gone.
High school represented independence. Independence represented lunacy without guidance. Lunacy represented pain and suffering physically. No, I would not do it again.
Mom was busy raising the new two. There was no events we attended at school. Nothing.
Luz Casa was one friend. Noman was another along with Kim.
The suffering I encountered was because of the lack of supports. Everyone left. My advice is do not leave your siblings until they complete their goals and a basic one is to finish school.
As a social worker, I wish I had the supports I provide to other families that are similarly situated. That is all. The regret was the abandonment. The lack of supports. That is all.
Baby brother left at some time to be with the others, I was down to one, myself, and then he came back. We were reunited and stuck like glue afterwards. Hope this helps you to see and understand my teenage years were not fun.